Seeking the Past: Israelis Track Down Lost Friends and First Loves

Some relationships leave a mark that lingers for decades, refusing to fade even when paths diverge. Whether it is an army buddy, a partner in a youthful prank, a first love, or a childhood pen pal, the urge to look back is universal.

Four unique stories illustrate what happens when people set out to find figures from their past, discovering that sometimes old bonds can be brilliantly renewed, while other times closure takes an entirely unexpected form.

Memories from the Sinai Desert

"I arrived at Etam Airbase in the Sinai in 1979, after spending a year in the IDF headquarters in Tel Aviv," recalls Ruth Shilo. "I had dropped out of the officers' course and asked to be posted somewhere near the sea. They offered me Etam, near Yamit. Soldiers found the long, sandy commute grueling and immediately rushed to file requests for a transfer, but I fell in love with the place."

Shilo was stationed in the aviation squadron commander's office alongside two other clerks, Eva Dadon and Tzvia Bukobza. "We got along wonderfully. I would arrive at the pool in the morning and head to the office at four in the afternoon, relieving them and staying on duty as late as necessary. When I asked to sign on for permanent service, the commander joked that the lifeguard would be the one signing me up.

We barely went home because we enjoyed the base so much. Since our discharge, we hadn't seen each other. Suddenly, I felt like reaching out; I contacted them, we talked, laughed, and exchanged photos, though we haven't met in person just yet."

Partners in Crime: Prison 6

Itamar Hatzor (75), originally from the upscale Tel Aviv neighborhood of Tzahala and now living in Hod Hasharon, recalls a defining moment from his military service. "In late 1970, I arrived at the IDF Officers' School from the Armored Corps. During a night navigation exercise, while serving as a squad leader, another cadet named Avi Schwartz and I decided to ditch the exercise and head to an Air Force party at Har Arikha.

To get the navigation codes in advance, we set off in the afternoon, but unfortunately, we got caught. We were dismissed from the course and sentenced to 21 days of detention at Prison 6. On our way to the military prison, we took a photo, and I still have it today.

We were released after 11 days following a plea for clemency submitted to the regional commander at the time, Ariel Sharon. As a nostalgic type fascinated by Israeli history, I decided to track down Avi. I turned to the 'Closer' tracing group on Facebook.

They got back to me with two families named Schwartz, and through them, I reached Avi, who in the meantime had hellenized his last name to Shaham. We spoke on the phone and corresponded after not seeing each other since 1971. He was in shock, and it was a deeply emotional reunion."

Hatzor mentions another tracking attempt from his past: "Back in 1966, when I was 15, my father took me on a 2,500-kilometer kayaking trip down the Danube. When we returned, an article about the journey was published, and following it, I received a letter from a 13-year-old girl asking to be my pen pal.

We corresponded and even met a few times. I saved all the letters. When I asked the Facebook group members to locate her, they made a massive effort and found her, but she chose not to meet."

The First Love

Naama Harpaz (27) launched a search operation for her 93-year-old grandfather, Shalom Alexis Messika. "My grandfather immigrated to Israel from Tunisia in 1956 and settled in Kiryat Shmona. Upon arrival, he met Rina, a soldier-teacher who taught at the school by day and taught Hebrew to new immigrants by night, and he was among her students.

One thing led to another, and they dated for two years. It was a very innocent relationship, and she was his first love in Israel. He recounts that it never went beyond a kiss. The relationship ended when she moved to study in Jerusalem.

Naama's grandfather married in 1961, fathered seven children, and has lived with her grandmother ever since. Following the events of October 7, 2023, the couple was evacuated to Modiin, where they currently reside.

"One day I sat with my grandfather and he nostalgically told me about someone he knew, loved, and lost touch with," Naama recalls. When he expressed how much he wanted to meet her again and reminisce, she turned to the Closer group for help.

"We discovered her name was Rina Madrashi, but unfortunately, we learned that she had passed away two years earlier. It felt like a massive missed opportunity.

Her family members told us about her passing, and we discovered that her grave is located in Rehovot, close to where I live. We went to weave a bouquet of flowers at the shop where I work, visited the grave, and my grandfather said a few words. For me, it was deeply moving to give my grandfather a sense of closure, even if it wasn't quite what he had anticipated."

A Time Capsule

Oren Cohen left Israel at the end of 2003 and currently lives in Belgium with his partner and their son. During a recent visit to Israel, his father pulled a time capsule out of the storage room containing letters from Oren's childhood.

Inside, Cohen found a letter decorated with stickers that he received in his youth from Ayala, a pen pal he met through the pen-pal section of the teen magazine Rash Echad.

"I thought to myself, why not see what happened to her? So I drafted a humorous, catchy Facebook post and uploaded it to the Closer website." Oren's post went viral, and he received numerous inquiries as a result.

"Eventually, someone sent me her Facebook and Instagram profiles, and we have been corresponding ever since. Maybe we will meet in the future too.

The feeling was immensely satisfying—seeing people smile at your post and reminding themselves how innocent things used to be. In Ayala's first letter, she wrote down her home address and phone number, something we wouldn't dare do today.

There was also a lot of innocence back in the sixth grade, and it took me and everyone who read the post right back there. That is essentially the essence of Facebook: finding old friends and reviving communication with them."